Recent Update

I have not been writing recently about my brother. I just have the intent not to since I felt too overwhelm of what has been happening to our family and the ordeal we are facing. To the point I intend to stay away from meeting and talking to friends. The issues with my family was too much to bare. To my last recall, I avoided the issue. I didn’t want to talk about it. But, since I feel a lot better now I could say a little something.

The last time I talked to mom, she said that my brother is starting to eat. The news makes me feel lighthearted. Though, I wish his progress could be faster than normal. But, what little progress he can do in his own way is much better for me to know. I rather want to hear some little progress rather than not knowing his been trying at all.

In the house my family do home care for him. It’s a tedious work. At the same time it’s too expensive to support his medical maintenance. We, the family are trying our best to support him as much as we can and we just hope that the support we give him will give him the motivation to give more effort to progress. We want him to feel much better and that he can do normal things on his own.

Thinking back the time I was there with him in the hospital, our room was full of people. The room was located just across the nursing station. Many student interns hang out in our room and it’s nice to get some help from them. Though at times I felt like complaining because the room was just full of them. Eventually it subsided and one by one their gone and here comes all the nurses wearing their uniform and scrubs to monitor my brother’s vital signs and condition.

At the back of my head, I questioned myself if I could be a nurse. Working and helping sick people. The thought of wearing those medical nursing scrubs which looks so nice to wear and being able to help people is a very dignified job. I wanted to be like them. But yet, there are things that I can’t do and I won’t be able to. First, I always get to attached to people easily. I am very sensitive. You have to have a tough skin to be able to perform your job well. I think it won’t be possible for me. I wish I could have the strength and passion to be one. I guess it's not for me.

It could have been better if I were a nurse. I could have been a great help to my brother. What I only hope now is for my family to continue to help my brother with all their strength and might to make him improve and give him his love unconditionally.